Bloodsucking: The Pros and Cons


  • I was saved from hell on earth (AKA the Hambys).
  • Some guys think it's hot, like Tommy.
  • I can protect the man that I love. 
  • Blood tastes so damn good. 
  • I won't have to worry about wrinkles! 
  • No more curfews! 
  • I can say "fuck" all I want. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.
  • I have a new family now. Bill, Sookie, Pam, Bon Temps… Beats the hell outta bein' surrounded by holy rollers!


  • People who don't even know me hate me just because of what I am.
  •  My virginity is immortal. Tragic.
  • I'm a freak of nature!
  • Blood tears. Gross. Major gross.
  • The term "sunburn" takes on a whole new meaning.
  • I get fang boners, totally embarrassing!